Reluctantly, I was told i should blog this... So here...

Inner Conflicts.... 

Not liking Saturday crowds.
So someone knows i dont like saturday crowds.
Invites to pub.
I say What on a saturday? HOPING they go d'oh, of course there might be too many people...
They didnt.. they said
Come on, it'll be quiet....
I said thanks for asking, id rather not.
Was i rude? nope.
Did i say fuck off?
Nope.
Hopefully they understood.
They might not be Remembering i was assaulted , on a weekend 2 yrs ago, well on a friday, which is weekend crowd anyway. That does stick in mind... but hey. People go MEH.

But going ... its also perpetuation of someone im NOT, inside.
Thats the bit that gets me. every time. Im not going.