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Saturday, 20 November 2010

Darwin Awards 2010

Hey, You may've seen this, but I share it here:



The Darwin Awards are drawn up each year and are a tribute to those who give their lives to prevent their genes getting into the Human Gene Pool.)
 

8th Place

In Detroit , a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18in wide sewer grating to retrieve his car keys.
7th Place
A 49yr old  San Francisco  stockbroker, who "totally zoned when he ran", accidentally, jogged off a 100ft high cliff on his daily run.
6th Place 
While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 ft hole for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5ft of sand. People on the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.
5th Place
Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was robbing. Death was caused when the long torch he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free, rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.
4th Place   
Sylvester Briddell, Jr, 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.
3rd Place
After walking around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms intent on robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was standing at the counter... Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire and several customers also drew their guns and fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located forty seven expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed twenty three gunshot wounds (poor shooting at that range!). Ballistics identified rounds from seven different weapons. No one else was hurt.
HONOURABLE MENTION
Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just driving around at 2am so they lit a stick of dynamite to toss out the window to see what would happen. Apparently they failed to notice the window was closed.
RUNNER UP
Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least ten men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4.30am. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and then tied the other (!) to the bridge. His fall lasted 40ft before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen.  Bingham's foot was never located.
AND THE WINNER IS . . . . .
Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt ( Paderborn ,  Germany ) fed his constipated elephant twenty two doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief.  Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded.  The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant continued to evacuate 200lbs of dung on top of him. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves.... shit happens.

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